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I am not dead.

that seems to be my usual once-every-so-often post. Kinda wishing I was, but not. Wanting a fucking reset button.

Wanting a couple of other buttons too, like a "this makes your girlfriend horny" button. It's really kinda painful -- watched a couple of movies (the whole nine yards, SOB) that had lots of sex/nudity/whatnot... the biggest turn on by far was how avidly horny the respective females were. I want that sort of magnetism, at least in my monogomous relationship. :/

beyond that... spent a week and a day down in L.A. Now I've got about a month's worth of stuff to catch up on (I'd already been putting things off for a while, trying to relax... and I can't concentrate for the life of me while I'm down there -- the television is essentially in the same room as the computer, the computer's on a 56k connection, the monitor's resolution is, well, low... and there's always a handful of people about). Plus I somehow lost my usual night-time schedule, so even my most productive hours were nonexistant.

but enough whining. I doubt I'll catch up on most of your journals. Hope all is well, and I expect I'll be keeping up with them again for a while, at least. I might have to unsub slashdot -- it's nice, but.... yeargh.


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 29th, 2002 10:19 pm (UTC)
The chase is the best part, the challenge of getting someone to shower you with affection and approval... Or to keep it flowing in a relationship. It's why some people keep hunting, to get that initial rush again. A button to reset that would be a great boon.

Sometimes I wish I could just press a switch in my spine and go offline for a few hours... Just stare at the cieling and go blank until everything gets better. Then, of course, I'd have to find another switch to turn off Boss's anger when I don't show up... eagh!
Dec. 30th, 2002 03:14 pm (UTC)
It's a long-term relationship thing, not any sort of shortcoming on your part. Like the other person to comment explained, the initial rush is the thrill of the chase. That's just the way it goes.

I find Jon way more handsome than he was when we began dating 4 years ago (but when we began dating I really wasn't that attracted to him--he more or less wore me down until I gave in and agreed to a date.) I am also still very attracted to him. Our sex drives go up and down, depending on the time of month, the time of year, and the level of stress in both our lives. Also, I don't know if Amy is still dealing with the health stuff she was when I talked with you over the summer, but that'll do it for a sex drive. Also, being on the Pill can really kill a woman's sex drive. I finally just gave up and went off of it last spring for that very reason. Unfortunately, my skin is now much more prone to breaking out, but oh well. It's worth it to have a sex drive again.

I know--waaaay more than you wanted to know. :-) Just thought I'd toss my $0.02 in.

Good luck!!
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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