quasi random (kaolinfire) wrote,
quasi random
kaolinfire

oddly frustrated

I've been working my ass off for nfg today. and nobody is around to talk to. my emails fall into a deep void. the worst part is the code I'm writing is pure shit. I'm just hacking it in, left and right, praying I'll hit the end soon enough. because there's no time for anything better. and it *should* hold together. that's not really in question. it's just. ohmygodit'ssougly!

one thing to say for the complexity of the project, at least -- it's not immediately obvious how to do it better from this juncture. I think that would take just on its own a month of sitting down and planning things out. and then a month or two easy of really solid work. something like that. and even then, I don't know how much easier it would be to use. and people don't tend to notice how ugly something is on the inside, when they can only see the veneer. mind you, the veneer is peeled back in a few places. but they're a forgiving bunch.

#&*$*#$YKJFHKSEJHR. i want to write. I want to be creative. I ... I'm going on a road trip with amy soon (in a day or two). and then burning man. oh god yes, burning man. :) those both should help my stress level some. some some some.

some some some some some.

I really did do a lot that was on my todo list today. more to go, though, before I can justify a road trip. thanks for listening.
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