quasi random (kaolinfire) wrote,
quasi random

thoughts with a friend (creativity and creation?)

> When I play guitar, I always have the same frustration. There is lovely music in my head that I want to hear aloud, so I pick up a guitar and start to play it. Immediately, my hands take over, and instead of hearing what I want to hear, I hear some jumble of stuff that my hands make up without the courtesy of asking my brain what *it* wants to hear. I get really frustrated, because, while it may sound at best okay, it's not what I want.

Interesting. This is very much how I paint. I have something in mind, but I know what I do will not be that something. What I do may be better, may be worse, and is largely colored by what I was hoping to do; but I know my "skill" is mediocre, and my "talent" (or "luck") is pretty good. So I tend to go with whatever.

Writing is much easier; language is so easy to move around and change until you get it right. It's very deterministic, at least for me--what I *want* is a mood... and then out spew words in that vein (give or take). The words tend to create that mood, minus, again, roughness due to lack of skill. (but I have more skill here, at this point; does that *stifle* the creativity?)

I still "dream" of doing music. My attempts tend to last a few hours tinkering with this or that toy, and then I'm off again to something I'm more familiar with. Somehow, the ... entire approach... to music doesn't sit well with me. It's the whole 'timing' thing, I think. The transient nature of 'picking things out' coupled with the strangeness of multiple things happening at the same time. So I keep trying to think up different approaches, ways that I can just say "mood" and "color" and ... (well, yeah, we've been down this road). But I don't stop thinking about it. I just don't get anywhere. yet?

And neuroscience is in there... mind and connections... what connections would the mind make if it was super-concious? what dreams could be recorded directly, without the intervention of motor skill?

What woould art BE? What *could* art be?

And now it's apparent that I've been up since yesterday, so I'll say goodbye to this rambling.

> or is it this bizarre, uncontrollable, external force that just comes in and takes over, whether someone wants or not. I am somewhat inclined to believe the latter, since it fits in very well with the idea of the muse (which Kaolin may appreciate).

Though I don't feel so taken over, so much. Just... the way I like to phrase it is I know how to play around, and I have a very defined eye for what I like. I tend to be able to play around until I see something I like, and then develop it.


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